Today I want to talk about an important word. It is a word that much of our world has forgotten. It is a word that Christ talked about, a word He showed in his life, and a word He showed in his death. It was written in the wounds on His hands and feet, and woven into a crown on His head. He bore this word on His shoulders from the moment He was born.
Empathy.
Empathy is defined as being able to understand and share the feelings of those around you. I want to take it a step further, however. I once heard someone say that they were an "empath", and that is why they don't like being in crowds of people. They explained that when they see someone hurting, they hurt with them. They are physically and emotionally unable to shut the suffering person out, and they must try to comfort them. They see the hurt, and they share the hurt. They have compassion on those who suffer, and until the suffering is attended to, they suffer also.
Jesus was like this. In Matthew 14:14, Jesus, after having heard about John the Baptist's execution, went out on a boat to have time alone. When he came back ashore, a crowd had followed Him, and his reaction was instant:
"Jesus saw the huge crowd as he stepped from the boat, and he had compassion on them and healed their sick." ~ Matthew 14:14
I understand this, deeply. It is both a blessing and a curse to have uncontrollable empathy. Many people don't want to be sympathized with, while others misinterpret empathy as you "getting too close" to them, or your trying to take advantage of them in a time of weakness. Still others will try to take advantage of people who have empathy, and use them until they have nothing left to give. Empathy is not something that is not felt by the one who gives it. Empathy hurts when you give it. Jesus experienced this in Luke 8:46 when a woman in a crowd who needed healing knew that Jesus could give it, and so she touched the hem of his robe as he walked by:
"Jesus said, "Someone deliberately touched me, for I felt healing power go out from me." ~ Luke 8:46
This is important to understand, because if Jesus did not experience a feeling of loss when someone else was healed by Him, then His love was useless. To empathize with someone, you lower yourself to their level of suffering, and you do not rise up again until the healing has begun. It means counting another person's hurt and suffering as greater than your own comfort, and immediately bearing the burden of that person's hurt.
As adults, we may find this difficult to do. We don't like to suffer. We don't like to talk to people who might need something from us. When we see someone hurting, we often look for someone else to fix it, or we pretend we didn't notice, and walk away.
The other day I was at an Upward soccer game at our church, and I was taking photos of the players like I do every year. It had been a hard week for me at work, and my heart was suffering. I needed empathy, but like most adults, I am afraid to seek it. I asked God to show me empathy, and like He always seems to do, he answered in a way I did not expect. On the sidelines of one of the games, a little girl had gotten hurt and was now feeling the physical and emotional loss of that. Her face was cast down, and she had tears welling up in her eyes. I have to admit, I immediately knew how she felt. Then I saw another thing happen. Another little girl came over and sat by her, and instead of trying to fix the problem with laughter and humor, her face began to mirror the pain of her friend. She spoke to her with gentleness and love, and until the little girl smiled again, she did not relent, or smile herself.
This was bearing her friend's hurt. She wasn't trying to shuck it off by making light of it, or pretending it didn't matter. She was embracing her friend's pain. She was clothed in empathy. Later on, (much later) I asked the little girl (her name is Ivy) "When your friend hurts, you feel her hurt, don't you? You don't just want to make her feel better, you literally feel the sad in her, and you can't turn it off until you make it better, can you?" Ivy shook her head. She understood. She got it. She embodied empathy in it's purest form.
What would our world be like if we began emulating Ivy? If the people we saw who were hurting didn't just become a thing to be pitied (or ignored), but someone to be borne up on our own shoulders? What if your friend who is suffering is the cross you must bear today?
Today is all about that very empathy.
Happy Easter. <3
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